“When I Listen, People Speak and Come Alive: Empathic Listening”

When you ask someone how they are and they say, “I’ve had a terrible day/week,” or “Not so good,” or even, “Ok, I guess,” any response which indicates they are less than wonderful, do you know what to do to be of most help to them?

The most helpful way to respond to others when they are experiencing distress is not by giving advice, consoling, questioning, sympathizing, (our common notions of “helping”), but rather through empathic listening—meeting them where they are!

Empathic listening, which goes counter to what is commonly understood as help, is a way of being with someone when they are experiencing upset whether it’s about something recent or long lived. The process of empathic listening was discovered 80 years ago by psychologist Carl Rogers and is learnable and doable by virtually everyone!

In this forum you’ll learn the process of empathic listening, making you a better listener and therefore a better friend!

ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Allan Rohlfs has practiced listening as a psychotherapist and taught it widely for five decades, including for 30 years to seminary students at the Lutheran School of Theology at Chicago. He wrote the book When I Listen People Speak and Come Alive: Empathic Listening, which will soon be published.

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Learning Tree is a forum in which we gather (typically on the second and fourth Sunday each month) to listen, learn, and engage with a topic that will help to grow our knowledge and faith. We may hear from our Ministers, church members, or speakers from the wider community. These are free learning opportunities open to all. If you have ideas for speakers/topics that might be of interest to our CUC ‘ohana, you may contact Pastor Rushan (rushan-sinnaduray@centralunionchurch.org).

There will be NO Learning Tree on November 10.